Uwe Boll (“House of the Dead”, “Far Cry”) is regularly compared to Ed Wood (“Plan 9 From Outer Space”) and it’s easy to see why when you watch “BloodRayne”. The movie is based on a videogame that I’ve never played and it feels like it’s trying to cash-in on the “Blade” and “Underworld” franchises as well as “Van Helsing”.

Set in the 18th century, “BloodRayne” tells the story of a half-human, half-vampire by the name of Rayne (Kristanna Loken “Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines”). She slays vampires as she hunts for the notorious Kagan (Ben Kingsley “Gandhi”, “Shutter Island”) and there really isn’t much else to it than that.

Kristanna Loken is incredibly bland as Rayne. I’ve seen the vampire hero done before and I didn’t care for it in “Blade” or “Underworld”. It’s shocking that the highly-respected Ben Kingsley is in here but he’s not the only big name in here. Michael Madsen (“Reservoir Dogs”), Michelle Rodriguez (“Resident Evil”), Billy Zane (“Titanic”), Meat Loaf (“The Rocky Horror Picture Show”) and Udo Kier (“Ace Ventura: Pet Detective”) all somehow managed to get talked into doing this movie along with Kingsley. Everybody in the film gives a terrible performance and I’m sure they all had bitter conservations with their agents afterwards.

“BloodRayne” is a lousy even by the standards of the competition such as “Blade” and “Underworld”. I didn’t care for either of those movies but at least they looked pretty impressive, “BloodRayne” looks cheap and nasty. I saw Uwe Boll’s “Postal” and didn’t think its infamous reputation was necessarily deserving but I totally get why people hate “BloodRayne”. Boll is known for challenging film critics that didn’t like his movies to boxing matches and I’m pretty sure watching those fights would be more interesting than anything found in “BloodRayne”.