Action star Jean-Claude Van Damme was once big with movies such as “Bloodsport” and “Universal Soldier” but then after a series of bad pictures such as “Street Fighter” he disappeared in the realms of low-budget rubbish and in this film Van Damme says a lot of bad things about himself because he knows that he’s not Orson Welles making “Citizen Kane”.

Down-on-his-luck action star Jean-Claude Van Damme is losing his custody battle and he’s running out of money. When he returns home to Belgium he goes inside a post office and is framed for a robbery, making the film in some respects a weak “Die Hard” knock-off. Not much happens in the film and it becomes very dull to sit through.

It’s hard to say if someone is a good actor when they’re playing themselves but I don’t think Van Damme has enough charisma (particularly as himself) to need a movie about him. Van Damme mocks himself harshly as he has a go at his financial stability, his movies and his acting ability. I was hoping for Van Damme to have to become like a character in an action movie because that would be funny. The villains are very weak and the one thing you need in an action movies is good villains.

“JCVD” has some amusing moments such as the brief appearance by Van Damme’s parents and the mention that Steven Seagal (“Under Siege”) got the role in a film Van Damme auditioned for. Van Damme has got a sense of humour about himself and that’s good but it’s a shame he’s been included in such a poorly written film, which is far too serious for a movie meant to be making fun of someone. If you’re a fan of the ‘Muscles from Brussels’ then maybe it’s worth checking out (it’s got to be better than some of his other pieces of work).