The 1950s is often considered the golden era for bad B movies. “Attack of the Crab Monsters” directed by the infamous Roger Corman (“The Wasp Woman”) won’t even put something vaguely resembles a smile on the most diehard monster movie fanatics.

Normally these sort of movies are too long so I thought with a runtime barely over an hour it might just be fun but the film drags with an inconceivably dumb plot about mutated crabs monsters the are destroying and island and can put human brains inside them. I thought with a mere hour we’d just get crabs killing people but we only get a dozen or so shots of the monster and seen as this should be the one good thing about the movie you’d think they’d design well or make it hilarious, neither of those two is done here.

There aren’t characters in “Attack of the Crab Monsters”, there are simply some actors and actresses walking on camera and struggling to remember boring lines before the waddle back off camera. I’m not surprised the cast did such a bad job, with the low pay you get doing this type of film you most feel really bad about yourself. Most of these films do poorly in the acting/character department but this one does exceptionally bad.

When you watch a movie like this you don’t expect a classic or even something good but the film lacks the laughs created by films such as “Robot Monster” and the “Godzilla” franchise. No effort has been put into any part of this film, each and every moment just tries to wing it but it doesn’t succeed. If this movie were someone doing a test it would be ungraded. This movie made me ask a question “How does Roger Corman sleep at night?” as I would be tossing and turning all through the night if I had the knowledge I’d created something this monstrous.