“Guinea Pig: Devil’s Experiment” is an almost impossible film to review because it defies any conventional structure. It’s not so much a film but a chance to show off some special effects work and try to make you feel as though you’re watching an authentic snuff film. While the violence is certainly no more outrageous than that featured in films such as “Cannibal Holocaust”, this is far more monotonous.

We start with an opening crawl; it is clearly intended to make you feel like you’re watching something you really shouldn’t be. A young Japanese woman is kidnapped, beaten and tortured mercilessly by three men. They hit her and they hit her and even put a sharp piece of metal through her eye. The whole thing is very dark and hard to see what’s going on. It’s just non-stop brutality, watching a woman being tortured in increasingly depraved ways.

There are no real characters. There is a woman and there are three men but we no virtually nothing about any of them. We just see the men inflict unspeakable pain on the woman. The real star is not any of the cast members but the special effects. They are impressive but they also are never fully convincing.

If you are somebody intending to make special effects for horror films then maybe this would be a somewhat interesting film to check out. For anybody else, this is just a pointless exercise in total depravity. It certainly does try to make you feel like you’re watching an actual snuff film but considering the ways in which you are probably going to find a way to watch this, you’ll know it’s just a fake. You could only really be tricked if you had never heard of it and somebody handed you an unmarked tape with this on.

“Turning Red” is a new animated family flick from Disney and it’s honestly probably the worst animated Disney film I’ve seen. The film has received some criticism from Christian groups due to its depiction of Chinese spirits while other parents are angry about the references to teen girls’ periods. However, I just hated it because of its obnoxious characters and bad writing.

Meilin (Rosalie Chiang) is a Chinese girl living in early 2000s Toronto, Canada. Due to an ancient family curse, she starts turning into a red panda whenever she gets emotional. Her mother (Sandra Oh “Sideways”) initially assumes this is just part of puberty but then realises it’s the whole panda thing. Now, Meilin must learn to control the power of the panda as her family gather to help perform a ritual to remove it from her.

The characters in this film are beyond annoying. Meilin has got to be one of the most unlikeable protagonists ever featured in a mainstream film. Her friends are really bland and irritating too. The mother character is slightly less annoying but I still don’t like her. The red panda looks pretty lousy. To think that this is more than a decade after DreamWorks did “Kung Fu Panda” and this doesn’t really look much better.

“Turning Red” is a horrendously stupid film. The red panda analogy for girls’ periods simply doesn’t work very well when periods themselves are so clearly referenced. The characters are just awful and I hated spending time with any of them. The animation is also pretty weak. Disney is meant to innovate with its animation and yet this is far less visually interesting than most other Disney 3D animated films and even other studios’ animated films such as “Wish Dragon” and “Kung Fu Panda”. “Turning Red” is a real low point for Disney.

The “Jackass” team are back. Even though they’re older, they certainly are not any wiser. Johnny Knoxville and his old buddies (and a few new ones) are still out to do as many stupid, painful and disgusting stunts and pranks as possible.

“Jackass Forever” sees the gang getting back together to be even more outrageous than before. Many of the stunts seem to focus on damage to the male genitalia with the ‘Jackasses’ getting punched, stung by bees and attacked by a bird in the most sensitive area on the male body. Other stunts involve jumping into a cactus, licking a taser and getting stung in the mouth by a scorpion. The gang also finally figure out a way to light a fart on fire.

Fans of “Jackass” may find it somewhat comforting to see after all these years, the old gang are still as dumb as ever. However, it’s also kind of sad to see none of them cleared up their act and went on to better things. I’m also amazed that any of them have been able to produce offspring. If getting smacked in the testicles in elaborate ways isn’t one of the depressing ways to make your money, I don’t know what is.

Parts of “Jackass Forever” are funny. There is something amusing about some of the elaborate slapstick and some of the gross gags. However, some of the stunts are underwhelming, a lot of the pranks fall flat due to mediocre responses from members of the public and some of the gags are just too disgusting for me. How is it funny to just dump pig semen on someone? If you ever needed evidence that nudity does not have to be sexual in nature, this is definitely the film to prove it. I don’t think any woman is likely to be aroused by any of the male nudity here. If you love “Jackass” then this is a great reunion but if you don’t, it’s just the same depraved shtick.

The first “Brother” film was made on an extremely small budget but it was such a big hit in Russia that the demand for a bigger and better sequel was there. “Brother 2” still had a small budget compared to any Hollywood film from the same period but it’s certainly looks bigger and more polished than its predecessor. While I liked the gritty realism of the first, I have to admit that parts of it were quite dull. “Brother 2” is definitely a more entertaining picture.

Danila Bagrov (Sergey Bodrov “Prisoner of the Mountains”) is in Moscow. There he finds one of his old friends from his army days during the Chechen War has been murdered. Danila learns his friend has a brother, who is a hockey player in America. The brother has got into some trouble with mobsters so Danila heads to Chicago to help resolve any issues with his very personal sense of justice.

Danila Bagrov maybe isn’t cinema’s most exciting character but he has grown on me. I liked him in the first one but I feel this second one helps to develop him even further. Like the first film, this is much slower than a lot of gangster films so we get a lot of time to know the characters rather than have tons of action. Of course, when Danila needs to kill, he does kill efficiently. Audiences outside of Russia and Eastern Europe maybe shocked at some of the racism. Some of the dialog angered parts of the Ukrainian audience.

“Brother 2” is a lot like the first one with a lot of style. I think the action sequences here are a little better than in the first one and I do like seeing Danila travel to America. His little road trip in the middle of the film is quite fun to watch. Both of these films are quite light on the violence when compared to many American gangster films such as “Scarface” and even “The Godfather”. I liked “Brother 2” and I think it’s improvement on the first.

“The Batman” is arguably the most disturbing “Batman” film to date. It’s a somewhat strange film because parts of seem to almost perfectly capture the essence of “Batman” yet there are other parts of this film that feel more like it’s trying to be the next “Se7en” or “Silence of the Lambs”. “The Batman” certainly has its flaws but it was an engaging superhero flick.

As Batman (Robert Pattinson “Twilight”, “The Lighthouse”) enters his second year of vigilantism, The Riddler (Paul Dano “Prisoners”) begins terrorising Gotham with a series of gruesome murders of the city’s elites. Batman will have to use his detective skills to unravel a mystery that may tear Gotham apart and cause Batman to reassess his own mission.

Robert Pattinson is okay as Batman. I was really not enthusiastic about his casting but when he’s in the suit, he’s fine. The problem comes when he’s Bruce Wayne. The Bruce Wayne persona neve acts like a billionaire playboy, he just acts like a social outcast. Bruce Wayne is meant to be a public disguise for Batman. Catwoman (Zoë Kravitz “X-Men: First Class”) is mediocre. Her costume is terrible. Why can’t she have a proper cat mask? The Riddler also has a pretty terrible costume. I dislike that they make him seem a little too real. He seems like an actual terrorist and/or serial killer. I get that they didn’t want to replicate the goofiness of Jim Carrey in “Batman Forever” but maybe this is too far. I did really like Dano’s performance though. The make-up work for Colin Farrell (“DareDevil”) as The Penguin is very impressive. Farrell gives a good performance. John Turturro (“The Big Lebowski”) is great as Carmine Falcone.

“The Batman” finally allows us to see Batman’s great detective work as the other films always seemed to gloss over this. I think some of the action sequences are good, I like the visual style and some of the performances are good. However, there are still problems and I think some of it just feels to real for a comic book film.

There are many big stars out there and sometimes, they make bad films. It happens to the best of us but some stars have unfortunately been in some incredibly embarrassing pictures so here’s a list of some movies that they probably wish we could all forget about.

5. The Party At Kitty And Stud’s – Sylvester Stallone

Before “Rocky” made him a household name, Sylvester Stallone appeared in a low-budget adult film by the name of “The Party At Kitty Stud’s”. Stallone was apparently really struggling for money at the time. What made matters worse is that after the success of “Rocky”, the adult film was released again, this time with the title “The Italian Stallion” (Rocky’s nickname) to capitalise on the boxing film’s popularity. I feel sorry for any unsuspecting audience member thinking they were seeing another “Rocky” picture.

4. Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation – Matthew McConaughey and Renée Zellweger

The fourth instalment in the “Texas Chainsaw” franchise features cringeworthy performances from both Matthew McConaughey (“Interstellar”) and Renée Zellweger (“Bridget Jones’s Diary”). While it’s certainly not unusual to find horror movies with big stars in early appearances, few horror films are as bad as this. I’m sure this is one film that both stars would love to forget.

3. Carnival In Rio – Arnold Schwarzenegger

Arnold Schwarzenegger (“The Terminator”, “True Lies”) became one of the biggest film stars in the world and later, he held political office in California. It’s then pretty awful to see him in a television travel documentary where he basically spends the entire time lusting after Brazilian women and groping them any chance he gets. I imagine if the masses were aware of this film, he might not have got as many votes in elections, especially from women.

2. The Star Wars Holiday Special – The Cast Of Star Wars

The first “Star Wars” film revolutionised cinema and remains one of the most culturally significant pieces of entertainment. Before following it up with “The Empire Strikes Back”, there was a television special for the holidays. Aired only once, you won’t find any official release of this on home video because everybody involved seems to be so embarrassed by it. Despite featuring the cast of “Star Wars” (along with several other celebrities), it is truly one of the worst specials in existence.

1. The Day The Clown Cried – Jerry Lewis

Even more rare than the “The Star Wars Holiday Special” is “The Day The Clown Cried”, a film that has still never seen any form of official release. There have allegedly been a few private screenings but Jerry Lewis (“The King Of Comedy”) did everything he could to stop this from being seen. That’s probably because it features him playing a clown tasked with luring Jewish children to gas chambers at a Nazi concentration camp.

“The Clown At Midnight” is a slasher film that starts off surprisingly well and has some genuinely creepy and intense moments. Unfortunately, what ruins it is the awful acting and performances as well as the decline in the writing as it progresses. If it had somehow managed to maintain itself, this could have been a great killer clown flick.

Kate (Sarah Lassez) is a teenager, who only recently learned she was adopted. Her birth mother was an actress, who was apparently murdered by her co-star in a production of “Pagliacci”. Now, Kate is helping to tidy up the old theatre where her mother was killed. It seems the killer clown may still be on the loose as Kate’s fellow students are being picked off one by one.

My biggest problem with this film is with the majority of the teens. While Sarah Lassez’s Kate is fine, the other teens are so darn annoying and the performances are just dreadful. Christopher Plummer (“The Sound Of Music”) is good as Mr. Caruthers, whose family owned the theatre. Margot Kidder (“Superman: The Movie”, “The Amityville Horror”) also has a role here. There is something kind of interesting about having the killer dressed as Pagliacci. I actually think some of the sequences with the killer are actually done very well, far better than most slasher films.

“The Clown At Midnight” definitely has its moments. I like some of the ideas, the twist at the end is somewhat predictable but it’s still done fairly well and there are some moments that are actually fairly scary. The dumb teenagers just really take you out of the experience and that’s so frustrating. Whenever they are onscreen, this drops from being a scary killer clown picture to being dud slasher below “I Know What You Did Last Summer”. It feels like two very different scripts were awkwardly mashed together, one for a psychological thriller and one for a typical slasher.

“Superman: Man Of Tomorrow” is a really disappointing DC animated film. It gives a new take on the beginning of Superman’s story. However, it just isn’t remotely interesting. If you thought some of the other DC animated “Superman” films were underwhelming, this seems to hit a new low.

In “Man Of Tomorrow”, Superman still hasn’t really made his presence known. He soon finds himself forced to reveal himself to the world when alien bounty hunter Lobo arrives on Earth. Superman also has to deal with the terrifying new threat of Parasite, who can steal Superman’s powers and thoughts just by touching him. In order to overcome Parasite, he will have to turn to Lex Luthor for help.

The Superman here is just deathly boring. I know that Superman is often not as complex a character as Batman but he should not be this dull. We have Lex Luthor, Lobo and Parasite yet all of them feel underwhelming. Parasite in particular feels so far removed from what I was hoping for. Lois Lane is totally wasted here. All the voice acting from everyone is just really wooden. I really dislike the animation style used and it’s a real shame that DC is using this more for some of their other films set in the same continuity. I just feel that all the characters look really lifeless.

“Man Of Tomorrow” is a total disaster with a bland story with way too many plot elements for any of them to get given an adequate amount of time. The action sequences are not remotely impressive either. I hated almost every single moment of this sorry superhero picture. DC has been really creative and engaging with some of its animated films but this is easily one of their biggest misfires. At least it’s not quite as bad as “Batman: The Killing Joke”.

“Porky’s” is one of the most famous teen sex comedies of the 80s. Sadly, it’s not all that funny. Other raunchy comedies such as “Animal House”, “Caddyshack”, “Private School” and even “Lemon Popsicle” are funnier. There’s nothing terrible about “Porky’s”, there just isn’t much to it.

Set in 1954, we meet Pee Wee (Dan Monahan) and his buddies from Florida’s Angel Beach High School. Their only real goals in life seem to be to pull pranks and get the sexy girls. After being publicly humiliated during a visit to the strip club Porky’s, a feud begins that culminates in the teens getting revenge on their establishment’s owners.

The characters in “Porky’s” are pretty forgettable. That’s not to say that the teens in many other films are particularly memorable. Some modern audiences may find some of the lewd pranks a little too far as probably the most notorious sequence in the film features teen boys spying on girls in the shower before deciding to stick part of his anatomy through the hole. Porky himself isn’t all that interesting as a villain. Probably the most interesting characters in the whole film are some of the goofy staff members at the high school. We have Honeywell (Kim Cattrall “Police Academy”), who has some rather unusual sexual practices. There is also the rather fierce Balbricker (Nancy Parsons “Sudden Impact”).

I’ll admit that everybody in “Porky’s” looks like they are having a great time. Even though some of the pranks and situations would be rather unethical and/or dangerous in reality, it’s done with a sense of playful innocence here. A major problem is that there just isn’t really any plot. There are plot elements but nothing that really ties any of it together in any sort of coherent way. A lot of the gags are also pretty lacklustre. There is often no real punchline, it’s just immature activity. If you are a big fan of some of the other films I’ve mentioned, maybe you’ll enjoy this but don’t expect too much.

“Shazam!” features the DC character Captain Marvel. However, Marvel also have a character called Captain Marvel, who had a film come out the same year as “Shazam!”. Despite the fact the DC character came before the Marvel one, DC decided to change their character to ‘Shazam’ (the character’s catchphrase). Confused yet? Anyway, this is a good superhero movie with exciting action and some funny moments.

Billy Batson (Asher Angel) is a troublesome kid that moves into a new foster home. He soon meets a wizard (Djimon Hounsou “Blood Diamond”) and is granted magical powers. Billy can now transform into the superhero Shazam (Zachary Levi “Tangled”). With his new foster brother, Freddy (Jack Dylan Grazer “It”), he must learn to master his new powers to defeat the evil Dr. Sivana (Mark Strong “Green Lantern”).

The young Billy is okay, I preferred his foster brother Freddy as he’s a big superhero enthusiast. I’m not crazy about Zachary Levi as Shazam. He never looks believable in the suit, which has enormous muscles. However, he did put a smile on my face a few times. I really liked the villain and Mark Strong does a great job. I wish we got more scenes with the bad guy. The demon characters that come out of Sivana look great. John Glover (“Gremlins 2: The New Batch”) has a small role. Again, I wish he had more to do. The little cameo with Superman is amusing as it’s clear they couldn’t get Henry Cavill (“Man Of Steel”).

“Shazam!” is ironically a better “Superman” film than most of the “Superman” movies as it has a caped hero flying around the city, saving people and fighting a supervillain. This movie has some terrific special effects, some of the humour is genuinely quite good and the action scenes are impressive. It’s got some more dramatic moments so the tone can feel a little confused at times but I enjoyed this movie overall. It’s not as good as “Aquaman” or “Wonder Woman” but I think I liked “Shazam!” more than “Justice League” (and it’s obviously way better than “Batman v Superman”).